Showing posts with label elon musk. Show all posts
Showing posts with label elon musk. Show all posts

Tuesday, May 6, 2025

We Have Other Things to Worry About, Elon

 

I know, Getting gobbled up by the sun is pretty, pretty, pretty BAD, but like, it's a few billion years off. You might as well get choked up about colliding with Andromeda (I guess we'll have to be multi-galactic people sometime or another). The climate change is really very likely to get us first--

And he supports Trump, who unfathomably thinks "clean coal" is a thing. So, let's just take that with a grain, hm? 

Monday, March 31, 2025

Why Elon Musk Gets Picked On

 


Huh. Where to start?

Musk alleges that another billionaire is handing out checks so that people will protest his and boycott his businesses. Because when you and your little DOGE gremlins are cutting aid to starving kids, Meals on Wheels, costing thousands of people their livelihoods and prancing about with a little chainsaw because BRRRR CUTTING GOOD!, people need a monetary reason to make them mad--right?

This is the kind of bullshit you get when your mama tells you the reason the other kids are picking on you is because they are just so jealous because they are dumb poors and not as bright and handsome as mommy's little man. 

Thursday, March 20, 2025

A Transformative Arc of Potential Energy

 


I have a deep and intractable vein of cynicism that runs through the entirety of my being--are all the Tesla fires politically demonstrative, or  is it possible that arson and cutting short the life of a piece of technology is not symbolic of a rage against the machine-manufacturer, but a smoke signal that the brand's issues are more immediate? I have wondered what the resale value of a Tesla is and whether that picture is likely to improve. Also, what flat sales mean for Tesla dealerships. And also, whether insurance payouts might be a motivator in some instances.

I'm not accusing people of a widespread conspiracy of bad faith. It's just if there WERE opportunists in the mix, I would totally not be surprised. 

As for me, I dislike criminality as a form of immediate protest. It gets one in more trouble personally than its effectiveness generally warrants and threatens to negatively color the message instead of raising the right kind of consciousness. I like protest movements to follow the rules of drama--start small and build to a place of pity and fear. I am very on the side of Swasticar Art and so on. Damaging other people's property, however, is a TERRIBLE TERRIBLE THING--which can also be done in entertaining ways and might be instructive, but by all means, I do protest it! How Awful! My stars and garters!

Sunday, March 16, 2025

It's Especially NOT Funny Because It's True

 


MAGA doesn't care about this. MAGA says these friends of child traffickers say some things we agree with, so we will ignore that they also exploit working class Americans and threaten our retirement, our Social Security and Medicaid/Medicare and so on. Because THEY SAY SOME THINGS MAGAS LIKE.

So, it doesn't matter if they support dictators abroad, want a dictatorship here, support billionaires first, not America, and wipe their asses on the Constitution.

They say some things the MAGAS like. Are they ever true, correct, necessary things? They are just over the shit rainbow and think being along for the ride is winning--even while they are riding on a soon-to be jettisoned sidecar. 

Saturday, March 15, 2025

It's Weird, Right?

 


Trump staggered up the stairs of the helicopter on his way to go play his customary weekend golf with the omnipresent little Musk kid leading the way. This is after a weird speech at DOJ HQ (weird especially for being there, and breaking the illusion of agency independence), complete with his rally music set. The man who was facing federal charges for storing classified information at his Mar-a-Lago resort/residence said he'd rather face jail than be seen as being old and mentally incompetent. 

And of course, Trump isn't facing prison because many people saw him as being fit to be President, instead, but you know, all of this weird, right? Like, I don't think this man is in his right mind, at all. But here he is.

Thursday, March 13, 2025

Submitted for your Delectation or Rue

 

So sayeth the Constant Golfer. But what of ElonWorld? 

Glad you asked: he's made sure he has a gaming system in his big boy DOGE government office. 

These are supposed to be people we take seriously. I don't even know how they take themselves seriously. 


(I've started writing science fiction (again!) over at one of my other places. Because sometimes fiction is easier to take seriously than whatever this is.  You don't have to read it. It's like my poetry, just another thing I turn to when I've got a lot of thoughts and practical outlets feel very awkward.) 

Tuesday, March 11, 2025

Things Are Going to Slide

 

Giggleheaded Goofus, Elon Musk, has not had a brilliant day. His Tesla stock did a really big slide. His Twitter acquisition, which he wants us to call "X", was shut down a lot because of an apparent DDOS attack. Musk wanted to allege that the IP addresses of the attack were from the "Ukraine area" and this is when, not for the first time, I understood Musk is a dumbass. Because really? Are the haxxors using their IP address and not masking with a VPN or whatever? And wouldn't it be wild if the haxxors were from the exact place kind of depending on Starlink to work, and are kind of mad at Elon, but not suicide-mad yet?

And how isn't the Ukraine area also possibly Russian invaders? Since Russia has competent cyberwarfare capabilities, not that our Department of Justice under Pam Bondi is fixing to bother with it. 

Would it just be a stitch if Russia decided to attack TrumpWorld just when they decided for the worst of all possible reasons it was time to make nicey-nice? 

Anyway, Teslas and their dealerships are being protested and vandalized. 

Almost as if that brand was the clearest signifier of Musk himself, and attacking it was the clearest way to attack him. And it could and probably is organic--even if Elon wants to insist on the idea of astroturfing. ActBlue--blah blah blah. George Soros, more blah blah blah. Musk isn't funny or original. 

Sunday, March 9, 2025

Yes, Donald, He Is Disrespecting You

 


Desperate weak boychild Trump doesn't get it--Putin isn't his bestie. That's part of what made him so mad when President Zelenskyy quite correctly pointed out that Putin had violated ceasefires before. Trump was MAD, I tell you! Because who would dare to question the rilly rilly tight bestie relationship Trump had with the guy who very obviously did not support an entire bot/disinfo network to make him president as if he was a total fucking patsy who could be easily manipulated into rolling over for Russia by financial or conspiracy theory means? Putin thought he was a useful tool-a puppet? As if!

Trump has complained a few times lately that Putin went through the Mueller investigation (the "Russia, Russia, Russia hoax") and maybe is also pretty sure the first impeachment impacted on Putin as well. 

Was he on the phone with his bestie? Did Putin comfort him and tell him they were in it together? 

Because whatever Trump was going through, Putin was safe in Moscow laughing his ass off that the US was having some chaos. No way, no how, was Putin BOTHERED in any way about what happened to Trump. 

Friday, March 7, 2025

Blowups Happen

 


The father of Grok, the possible DD Harriman wannabe, Elon Musk, has demonstrated his exceptional qualities as a businessman and leading light of tech industry by once again littering the sky with a "rapid unscheduled disassembly.". This comes a minute (more or less) after Trump explained to his cabinet and the world that maybe DOGE/Musk don't have the ultimate say in who gets fired--the cabinet heads do, as they should. 

DOGE has been prone to mistakes--like gutting nuclear safety.  Like using random keywords to delete programs and contracts because they don't understand sometimes words have two meanings. (Little bitches too young to know from "Stairway to Heaven", even. What even is "Enola Gay"?.) 

Admittedly, this is the same day that Trump played the Hokey-Pokey with the Mexico/Canada tariffs again--is his right foot in, or is it out? Has he tried shaking it all about? 

So what's up and what's odd with that? Oh, nothing. but the FAA having to shut down flights at airports in the Southern Florida area because Musk "made it rain." 

I can't be the only person whose brain does musical vignettes

I was going to sell electric cars, then I got high.

I was going to go to Mars, then I got high.

Now my spaceships and stocks are tanking,

and I know why! Hey hey,

Because I got high,

because I got high,

because I got high. 

Thursday, February 27, 2025

A TrumpWorld Cabinet of Curiosities

 


Pictures often are worth a thousand words--take a look at the picture above of Elon Musk, standing, not seated at the table, while Donald Trump is not even at the head of the table, but slumped, unnoticed by anyone, apparently drifting off to sleep. Just a podgy senior citizen with his hands in his lap, while everyone is listening to the real boss, who has not even bothered to put on a suit for the occasion but is dressed, as he generally is, like some close approximation an adolescent might make at adult clothing. He threw on a big-boy jacket over his play-clothes. 

It's not exactly The Last Supper, but what if I told you one of these folks assembled would betray Trump and every last one of them had eaten of his body and blood? 

We are getting on to a political Carnival. Lent for you, and Fat Tuesday for rich motherfuckers forever, so I felt like sprinkling a little Catholic consciousness over the above tableau. Also, I am very, very mean. 

I thought to myself when I perused Twitter's commentariat regarding the first cabinet meeting that what we were looking at was a Dunning-Kruger Group Therapy session where no one realized what their problem was and no one was getting any better. 

Sunday, February 23, 2025

Trans de Agua

 

February 20, 2025


So, a funny/not funny thing happened in Colorado, where conservatives made up a thing where Venezuelan gangs were taking up whole blocks of apartments. Which meant of course, if that were true, the first place ICE would have to raid would be those occupied dangerous gang apartment scary no-go zones, right?

Right?

Well, they did! And SOMEHOW, everyone and their mother found out about it, and the op was even delayed for a bit? (Even though ICE raids are basically, just like, Tuesday, even during the Biden Administration.) But then they did the thing, with hundreds of guys. Like, a whole multi-agency thing. 

Anyway, I guess everything was very disappointing for the Trump Administration, because maybe there weren't as many arrests as they hoped? So they sacked the experienced acting head of ICE. People figuring out there would be a stepped-up ICE presence out there was definitely the result of "leaks". And Kristi Noem is ready to get out the polygraph tests to sniff out the real problem in why deportation preparations have broken down, promising to get you and your little dog too if you were a DHS employee responsible for leaking. (I may have made that last bit up.)

Saturday, February 22, 2025

Doesn't Anyone Have a Price?

 


This one is just for the slow kids: the thing where Elon Musk supposedly doesn't have a price? I'm skeptical because why did this guy get "so rich"? What are his goals? What does he love?

One metric of stupidity is the lack of imagination. Stealing jokes or posts to get laughs is a sign of not being creative or imaginative. Carrying a sink to meme-ishly say "Let that sink in" is way dumber than anything Carrottop or Gallagher does, for example.  Even if you respect their brand of comedy--it's weak. Doing a chainsaw thing like Javier Milei is sort of clownish. 

All kinds of people are losing their jobs under this indiscriminate and dumbass regime. Dedicated public servants, veterans. Look--he might know something about cars or rockets or social media (He doesn't! That's the joke!) but clearly, he is supposedly sharp enough to pass a US citizenship test (also no!). 

Stupid people with money do stupid things with their money all of the time. Don't assume because Musk has billions he is SATISFIED with his life.

Tuesday, February 18, 2025

Acknowledging President Musk

 

There are tens of millions of people fraudulently receiving Social Security payments according to the genius minds of DOGE, led by our Dark Shadow President, The Elon. Or not. Actually, it could be that the CoderJugend and Musk himself are basically innumerate with regards to government processes and legacy computer systems that are basically a palimpsest of changes in technology and law going back decades. 

They could have requested some sort of agency-related sherpas to guide them through the mountains of data they were reviewing to not seem like hot messes, but somehow Trump was compelled to fire various inspector generals who would be those exact people, except they were kind of investigating Trump and Musk variously for just being all kinds of fraudulent little billionaire monsters. 

Sunday, February 16, 2025

The Dangerous Playground

 

I just want you to do a thought experiment with me for a little bit. You are a park administrator. The town council has allocated certain funds to build a playground in the park you administrate. They want, specifically, a jungle gym, slide, and swing set--the sorts of things that would be attractive and fun for children. There is already a designated space and it has been partially paved. There is no compelling reason not to use the allocated funds to build the jungle gym, slide and swing set. 

However, you don't especially love the idea of the playground itself on general principles and are trying to save park administration money because you have as yet to be determined reasons and saving money looks great on your personal resume.

So you hire three, let's call them-- "Stooges". They say they are builders, and that's good enough for you, because they seem bright enough. And they use some pre-made kits to get the ball rolling and build something that looks like the promised picture--but there are lots of unused parts. They have no idea how those go together, and assume they are just extras and cart them off. 

They are, actually, reinforcing beams, retaining straps, cement screws--parts intended to ensure the whole apparatus doesn't cave in under the weight of child bodies, fall over in a stiff breeze, or send children flying. But these budget builder fly-by-nights had no idea how anything worked, and now, we have kids approaching a rickety playground of doom. 

Kiddie carnage awaits. 

Saturday, February 15, 2025

Went Over Like a Lead Turd

 


You know, taking your weird-ass conspiracy-theorist Pizzagate asshole friend along with you on serious European business all by itself is a whole kind of offensive fuckup.  Oh, wait, maybe that was a Hegseth team fuck up.  The down with America, up with Russia dipshit horror shows were so boldly evident at this flea circus display from the supposed America First crowd I guess I got confused. Hegseth was the one who told everyone we ain't got no navy to speak of so don't count on us and we can bug out our military presence in Europe so don't get too comfortable. 

I say wild ass shit when I'm hungover too, so I guess the Fox News veteran's words aren't all that surprising to me. 

But JD Vance being a condescending and unpleasant pro-Putin scold with no sense of irony is also not surprising to me. He chided Europe for lack of freedom of speech while at home, AP was being barred from the White House and Air Force One because their style guide stays with the more (for 400+ years) appropriate "Gulf of Mexico". And while Tom Homan hates on people who want to use the First Amendment to tell undocumented people about the other rights they have under the Constitution. 

Wednesday, February 12, 2025

Obnoxious Manchildren

 


Anyway, the South African-born acting president of the United States changed his name on the site formerly and mostly currently known as "X" to the delightfully childish "Harry Bōlz" which is a call-back from 2023 and seems less like the act of a 53-year-old with an important government job and more like the stunt of a 13-year-old with 40 years' experience with "Big Balls" envy.  (Very young, and already a special little piece of work.)

You know, you could be tempted to believe that maybe, Elon Musk isn't really a person you can treat as particularly responsible. He seems to be "eccentric", which is the culturally acceptable term for very wealthy people we suspect of being a bit batshit. (I think it's wild that he carries his frankly adorable toddler son about in a way that in my darkest imagination looks like "ready-made Greg Stillson event horizon.") 

Friday, February 7, 2025

You Are What You Eat

 

You know, I would have bet anything that being Donald Trump's vice president, if nothing else, would involve eating a lot of shit. After all, he did try to get the last guy lynched. That said, I realized that JD Vance was just the guy for the job. Try to spin Trump's oddball pronouncements into something normal. Be willing to do anything for love of Trump. It's not that I like JD Vance--far from it.  

It's just that he has a very particular set of skills

So when Elon Musk has a racist manboy resign over making some very racist social media posts, we can see JD Vance fix his purty mouth to do that thing he does:


He "obviously disagrees" with the idea that marrying outside of your race is abhorrent and anti-Indian hate should be normalized--I assume? So says the JD Vance bio. But this is a kid, and his social media activity is "ruining a kid's life?" 

A 25-year-old posted that last year, player. 

TWGB: Terminal Main Character Syndrome

 

A young DOGE staffer has left because the Wall Street Journal had some questions, as in, "Is this racist account you? " I'm sure Elon Musk is shocked--shocked! That there are little racist pishers in his Kekistanian domain.  Wow. So exotic and not-vetted

What's really funny about this is, when our actual confirmed Secretary of State, former US Senator and former presidential candidate Marco Rubio, made a big statement about not going to the G20 in Johannesburg:


I wanted to ask the Real President (tm) Elon Musk if this was the result of his bitch titties being in a wringer over the concept of the US confronting the Woke Mind Virus on what used to be his terf. I mean, "turf".

Of course, I do. I was just confused because the US is obviously in a transitional period and our pronouns stopped being US and seem to be he/huh! regarding Astroboy. 

He's not the president that MAGA voted for, but he's what they got. Up in our databases, taking our numbers, deciding the size of the government HE thinks we deserve. Regardless of what any vetting into him might show, or what his conflicts of interest might be. 

Wednesday, February 5, 2025

You Bet Your Sweet FAA?

 


So, let me just express what I will consider my "conservative" reservations about the DOGE team "plugging in" to "upgrade our aviation system." I just don't know that a team of even extremely bright and committed young people, running on high optimism and little sleep, are going to do miracles sorting out air traffic control--especially if they approach this with a "move fast break stuff ethos."

I might be catastrophizing, but I worry that the guy who promised us driverless cars is thinking of something like air traffic control--without controllers.

Call me "analog"--a throwback. I believe in the human element.  I believe in lived experiences mattering for something. When I see something like this, I do think of what can go wrong, that an experienced knowledgeable expert in a given field, might think about, that even a very talented novice will not. 

Tuesday, February 4, 2025

Shart of the Deal 2: The Takers

 

This blog (me, Vixen!) understands that Trump thinks of himself as the Deal-maker, and his mishpocha love that for him. We discussed The Shart of the Deal a minute ago, and it's holding up. He imposes a threat, and will accept any terms that make him look like he got his "deliverables". He just got the Mexican president to send 10,000 troops to the border that were going anyway. He got Justin Trudeau to agree to the same kind of commitment he was already making. 

It's ok--just so long as Trump gets to take credit for something, even if it was nothing he actually accomplished (other than demonstrating to our allies that his government is duplicitous and not to be trusted, ruining our relationship in a completely shartastic way!)  And the 30-day pause probably just means we get another round of Trump drama. 

But the thing to recognize is Trump didn't do anything other than wreck our allies' faith in us Just like him patting himself on the back for the flow of the water (which is idiotic) into lakebeds that have nothing to do with the already-contained LA fires. It's bullshit--but he's a tv president for dipshits who watch too much tv. 

Which brings me to Elon Musk--his avatar Vizier and the shadow-president. 

Trump takes credit. I don't know what Musk is taking--but it's a whole lot, because he's rooting through our servers, gathering our information, and I have no earthly idea what all he means to do with it. But he is using boys young enough to be his sons to do it. 

TWGB: It's Raining Shoes!

  It certainly has been a minute, hasn't it? So, what brings me out of self-imposed blogging exile, if not something very relevant to my...