It's probably only laterally that Sean Spicer is actually an absurd figure--after all, having, as one's first job assignment,
the duty of fluffing obviously insufficiently ego-boosting inauguration crowd size is in and of itself a tone-setting moment, insuring that one is not only willing, but capable of making the descent to the mythological abyss. He is a
Kali Yuga (or Iron Age) avatar, perhaps, of Mercury,
Psycho-pompous (
Yama, as Lama
Ding Dong?). He is willing to drop his dignity, his professionalism, his pants, stripped like
Ishtar in the underworld, to hang himself
upside-down, backwards and twisted in
the service of Trump. But in the long-ago parlance, he's a rum cove, innit he? Clever like. If not too much, of course.
So what did today's
press briefing actually do?
Lied about things. Because although this is going out on the right-wing wire as a case of
"red-pilling", a falsehood about Secretary of State under Obama and one-time Democratic presidential candidate Hillary Clinton actually giving buttloads of uranium to Russia was treated as if this was a real thing--but no--this is bullshit. It was
dumb when Donald Trump ungrammatically and ignorantly repeated it from the intarwebs, and it still is dumb and ignorant and pretty much proof that Trumpists really do believe nonsense spread by bots and other barely sentient news-spreaders.
Think about it--one lady in the whole of the US can cede a fifth of all the uranium we have to a somewhat adversarial foreign power with no checks at all? And gets paid. With not one legal authority giving this any old nevermind at all? Really? Where's the hearings, like we had with Benghazi or the emails or...waitaminute! Based on all precedents we even have--if this was a real thing--WHERE ARE THE HEARINGS? (Yeah--this is not a thing, Also not things--Clinton being to blame for Benghazi --I still think this was the fault of Libyan terrorists--and the email error being somehow treasonous. These are not things. Sorry.)
You know, to believe that kind of thing, you'd almost have to be the kind of tool who believes that a person could be surreptitiously born in Kenya and for some reason have this thing covered up from the time one was a newborn until they somehow got to be president of the US, passing through various international changes of residence and school registrations and employments and even state and national campaigns for office! Hah! Or, like, be the kind of degenerate dipshit who thinks a conspiracy could very well exist that--get this--sees millions of actual people who are not even registered to vote, turn up in buses, and somehow, miraculously, match up with a voter registration at each location they were assigned to and not even get caught, but despite this level of pinpoint genius match of line-standing rando to inappropriate registration, no one never thinks to distribute this illegal voting largesse to the actual swing states where those votes were needed! Yowza! Or who even believe that one's office was in fact wiretapped by a president--quite illegally! And that not one bit of any dirt that could have been found out to embarrass one was ever released to turn the tide of an election--but you know. It still matters. Because sick and sad! And rigged! And whargarble!
So the press briefing can extoll how well this administration will see to the interests of American steel, when the
turnabout has already become the fait accompli. And the unprecedented perfidy of Democrats who won't vote for Gorsuch is, despite what we know of the unprecedented perfidy of not meeting with or voting on Garland, some
sui generis thing. We can be called to applaud the piss-testing of the unemployed, or even extoll the beneficence that lights the White House blue for autism, while having a cabinet that will do nothing to improve education or treatment or research for people on the autism spectrum.
Spicer's job is to lie. I don't even think it is to lie convincingly. I think he is only there to talk
through the press corps to the base. The Trump base. The people
who don't care that what the Trump Administration stands for is all lies, all the time.
I am so tired of the White House Press Corps not realizing that they are basically laundering the White House's dirty drawers when they do not,
as April Ryan was alleged to have, shake their heads at this entire mess. How do they hang in? How do their eyes not roll out of their sockets? How do they not walk out?
I'd be flipping chairs like
Flynn's flipping testimony. But I never did say I was a professional.
Like Spicer unquestionably is.
