Tuesday, March 28, 2023

The Fundamentals of My Feminism


 An artist depicted a Great Wall of Vaginas (Vulvas, actually) and because I'm me, I thought about the amazing plaster caster Cynthia Albritton of recent blessed memory, who got depictions of the units of so many male artists including Jimi Hendrix. The monuments to assorted gifted phalli aren't necessarily controversial--but someone has decided to be the decider of correct and appropriate vulvularity. 

We did not need that. Purity culture is already doing a wonderful job of telling female-bodied people we are having bad vulvas. They are telling young girls they are used up by just using tampons for their menses. 

We are told we are worth less because of our "body count" and that multiple penises and births are making our one interesting feature (our vag) less useful. Sloppy, slippery, loose, etc. 

They do not seem to know we have muscles on our pelvic floor that can push out whole human life many times over. We are not spent because of little penetrations (tampons, penises) when we are made to birth big-headed babies. Vulvas are elastic and fantastic. 

But anatomy is not destiny. Having a vulva or a uterus does not mean you identify as female, and I support referring to people who birth, menstruate, or have uteruses or vulvas, as being referred to in that way as appropriate. I am not being referred to when someone is talking about a "birthing person" and I don't feel excluded by that. I technically might be able to--but I know despite being female, that isn't me. It's a term of fact, not a judgment. 


I want to talk about the idea that one can definitely determine if a vulva is factory original or surgically enhanced for a whole minute. This is obvious bullshit. No human has seen all the vulvas. I have looked at many vulvas, and I know I have not begun to crack the infinite, fingerprint-like variety of this part of anatomy. Any person who thinks they can tell you they know for sure whether a vulva is the original article or a bit of work is just lying their face off. And it shouldn't matter, anyhow.

Your nose, whether original or surgically altered, wouldn't change who you are, whether you suffered from a deviated septum or a deviant cultural fixation on ethnic noses. Nor should one's other parts. Noses are bobbed, tits are lifted, tummies are tucked, and labia get altered, sometimes even by cis women who don't like the look of what nature gave them--and I don't love that for them, but I respect their bodily autonomy and hope they were well-educated and respected regarding their choice. 

To me, being a feminist means I don't question your femininity--I embrace your walk with me in it. I protect you and me both when I question gender essentialism and challenge the idea of gendered societal roles. I celebrate the diversity of our whole bodies and selves. I think gender criticism is dumb if it questions people for their choices and not society for its limitations. I love all of you, in all your varieties, for the people you can be regardless of your hormonal, anatomical and gendered boxes. Because the you I love isn't about your bits and pieces, but your business and peace of mind. 

I don't want people to lie about sexual parts because trans-identified people are in danger of being abused, and pretending you know the secrets of correct vagitude can get someone killed. I don't want people to lie about the idea that vulvas get used up by partners or even tampons because this devalues women by age and experience. We just get better. It's a whole fact. Because a whole person exists outside of one's reproductive parts. And that person grows and learns and experiences and becomes amazing. 

So I want you to know my feminism involves vulvas and not. It is non-anatomical and for the culture. It loves people and hates people being treated like things. I am critical of gender criticals and turf terfs because Fascists get bashings. It is intersectional or it is bullshit. It is for health and love at any size. And it will never tell you your body is wrong for being. It is valid because it is yours. 



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