Went Over Like a Lead Turd

 

You know, taking your weird-ass conspiracy-theorist Pizzagate asshole friend along with you on serious European business all by itself is a whole kind of offensive fuckup.  Oh, wait, maybe that was a Hegseth team fuck up.  The down with America, up with Russia dipshit horror shows were so boldly evident at this flea circus display from the supposed America First crowd I guess I got confused. Hegseth was the one who told everyone we ain't got no navy to speak of so don't count on us and we can bug out our military presence in Europe so don't get too comfortable. 

I say wild ass shit when I'm hungover too, so I guess the Fox News veteran's words aren't all that surprising to me. 

But JD Vance being a condescending and unpleasant pro-Putin scold with no sense of irony is also not surprising to me. He chided Europe for lack of freedom of speech while at home, AP was being barred from the White House and Air Force One because their style guide stays with the more (for 400+ years) appropriate "Gulf of Mexico". And while Tom Homan hates on people who want to use the First Amendment to tell undocumented people about the other rights they have under the Constitution. 

Greta and the Terrible Tate

 

I was vaguely aware of Andrew Tate before just a few days ago, mostly as a Terrible Influence for the Children--an openly misogynistic self-help toxic masculinist. I was very much aware of Greta Thunberg, who, although still a teen, has been the leader of a climate movement for years. So I very much understand what Andrew Tate was trying to do the other day by tagging her on his Tweet (from his recently-restored account under the new Regime) regarding his 30-something gas-guzzling cars--

He was seeking engagement with a higher profile account to get more engagement. It's what one does for more clicks, right? So, there he was, presumably tweaking a humorless scold liberal female on the social media when all of the sudden, she dunked on him. 

yes, please do enlighten me. email me at smalldickenergy@getalife.com https://t.co/V8geeVvEvg

— Greta Thunberg (@GretaThunberg) December 28, 2022

It's a thing of beauty in its spare economy of words. He called her out, and she said he was an overcompensating try-hard who needed to "get a life".  And his knee-jerk response has to be noted for all time:

How dare you!?

Weak. Afflicted. Shooketh. Taken out at the knees. Pressure applied to the nerve center of a very small area. That wasn't supposed to happen. 

Hours later, he composed himself, got into his smoking jacket, acquired a cheroot of some sort, sought out a wood-paneled back drop and a big old pizza box, and made a calm, obviously not-trying-too hard and does-so have a life video to the effect that he doesn't have a small one, she has the small one. 

(Right. She has a small one, it's his, and it's in her trophy room in a match box.)

And any way this social media exchange gave Romanian authorities enough information to find him and pick him up for rape and human trafficking, because sometimes people who espouse horrific points of view on the internet are, actually, horrible people. 

And there ends the lesson.