Thursday, May 26, 2011

I've been light on posting--big reason is douchebags.

There have been a quantum fuckton of stories I wanted to blogulate about, but they all had a depressingly similar hook.  Check these out, if you didn't see them anywhere else (but of course, you have):

GA. Rep. Rob Woodall, a recipient of government-provided health care, suggests that people should take care of themselves instead of expecting, um....the government to. Even though, technically, the government is sort of of, by and for the people so I suppose if we all, like, supported programs like Medicare....oh hell, what's the point?  The guy's a 3-liter douche.

KS GOP (duh) Rep. Pete DeGraaf  says women should just plan ahead for rape by getting their own insurance coverage that provided abortion in case of rape. Wait, what???? I suppose if a woman could afford to get her own coverage, then....she'd probably be able to pay for her own abortion anyway, but, I just don't think this guy has a clue about rape, women, abortion, insurance, or even why uteruses are not like tires and rapists are not like random bits of sharp road-debris. What he does know about, though? Being a huge grainy ice-water douche!

Notorious aurally-induced insomnia remedy Ben Stein follows in the footsteps of fellow douchebag, Bernard-Henri Levy, in defending Dominique Strauss-Kahn from pretty compelling allegations of rape on the basis of "OMG, a nice privileged rich old fellow like him would never do a thing like that!"  Coleur moi unimpressed with the pair of them--25-horsepower pressure-washing douches!

Add Eric Cantor stipulating that aid to Missouri tornado victims can only occur if budget cuts are enacted, Donald Trump hinting he might be back in the 2012 race if no one better comes along, the possible candidacy of Mr. 9/11 himself, Rudy Guiliani, and anything I've read about John Ensign and the mostly religious jackwagons surrounding him who aided and abetted his attempts at covering up his tryst with a staffer, and just anything having to do with Arnold Schwarzenegger and that business.

(Stingy douche, gold-plated douche, arsenic douche, holy water douche and steroid douche.) Basically, my only commentary on too much of what I've seen has just boiled down to "DOUCHEZ! OMG!"

And please--don't get the idea that my problem is with all the menz. Oh no--latest story that grinds my gears is NC Rep. Virginia Foxx's recently passed legislation that bans funds for teaching abortion techniques in health centers. As in, doctors should lose an avenue of learning a surgical procedure that can actually be used to save lives in the case of, say, a dead fetus or unseparated-afterbirth (neither of which should stay up in a lady's business for hygenic reasons), but which is too darn close to that nasty old abortion for poor innocent little doctors to be allowed to know thing one about it.  For proposing such a dumb thing (when does it get so "crystal clear" that Congress won't allow abortion funding that women can't be paid in money, which might be fungible for abortions, or doctors of any sort won't be able to see dime one of insurance money, because hey, you never know--might know how to do an abortion! She's an old-fashioned lye-soap douche.

That's right--I called them all DOUCHES. I am glad I got that out of my system.

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