Can't Anybody Here Play This Game?

 

(A post also to be known as "Republicans in Disarray.) 

I don't know why I'm leading with the story that a resolution from Matt Gaetz drafted September 15th was found under a baby changing table in the restroom underneath the House floor.  I guess it's because of my astonishment that we didn't hear about such a resolution like, Friday. And who left it behind? Maybe Gaetz himself, setting up the changing table with a couple parallel o' grams of Bolivian Borax to chase away the Floridian palmetto bugs in his high-rise skull? I know Gaetz was opposed to McCarthy even being Speaker like he was a new stepdad threatening to be the boss of him. 

And of such drama is the current House GOP currently made. They can't pass a resolution on Pentagon spending. None of them know what they want. They want to cut the spending. They want to fund border defense. They want to strengthen the defense but maybe not fund aid to Ukraine (the Moscow Marge Caucus, I guess you'd call it). Kevin McCarthy can't count votes and he doesn't count in uniting his troops. And I seriously don't know who is supposed to be Speaker for the GOP if McCarthy isn't. Scalise? Maybe they don't want nobody to be the Boss of Them. 

They just want to shut down the government for no good reason and impeach the Democratic president for no good reason the year before the presidential election? Is that so wrong?

(YES?)

What it means is they can't govern. But take heart!

Um, Trump is the leader of their party and a hapless fuckwit, also, too. It seems like, while in my heart of hearts I wanted Trump's document investigation to reveal selling secrets or something very dire, the bare reality is Trump just apparently took boxes of paper to save trees, because clearly, there were clean bits you could still use. All of this lovely notepaper for grocery lists and whatnot--says a Mar-a-Lago employee. 

And the material is back in the hands of the government to review with his peculiar Sharpie handed seismic handwriting and all. He also obstructed justice by telling his secretary she didn't know anything about the boxes she saw, just like nobody was supposed to know about all the boxes. Of all the stupid, stupid things. 

Did Trump just get busted for witness tampering and retaining documents and just disseminating them to random employees for scratch paper? This is a realm of stupid I never guessed, and no, it makes nothing better for him, because my gawd, teh stupids. 

And in other news, the GOP is reacting to striking people by wanting them fired like Tim Scott (Vivek Ramaswamy, of course  wants to fire like 75% of union federal government workers for no especial reason at all because he has no idea about what work is) and blaming Biden (like Nikki Haley does, because also--what calluses, beloved? The woman who also says the retirement age should be higher the way one announces the orphans need to eat their gruel or no fruit to ward off the scurvy.) because he supports unions and, you know, things like workers getting fair pay, good hours and benefits. Trump wants to ditch yet another GOP primary debate to visit with UAW to show some kind of solidarity?  Yeah no? This guy? 

The guy who also admitted in a very softball MTP interview that the idea to pursue Stop the Steal was all him? 

I'm sure these shining examples of political acumen are all doing their very best. 

I'm not saying that the GOP should or even can do better than this. I'm actually trying my best not to encourage luxuriating in the general fail everything the GOP is doing right now represents. But here's my most positive message: they seem so down? Time to kick them. And kick them. And kick them. 

And I didn't even go low here and talk about Lauren Boebert because why? It's a personal low, not a political one--those she's had all along. So I'm only a little less surprised if she doesn't hold onto her seat but that's a problem further down the road to be determined next election. We know McCarthy can't afford to censure fellow Republicans. And he might not hold onto his majority or his Speakership for a minute, anyway.