Now, you might think I was paying extra-special attention to Keebler Hate-Elf Jeff Sessions' testimony today regarding what he knows about stuff and whether he remembers any stuff, but he can basically get double-stuffed. (I still love the good people at Keebler and their products and approve in general of any cookie having Double Stuffing. But I am building on a metaphor about a certain bad cookie, and oh Gosh, I think Jeff has not been a good elf at all. I do not believe he would be allowed near a cookie-making facility in all truth.) But I did not do that, because Sessions can't remember shit.
Now, CRS (Can't Recall Shit) affects us all, and as I get older, I sometimes dotter into a room and realize I don't entirely know what I was looking for, or absently strike a few keys, and not realize why I'm looking at some computer conversation. But I think Jeff Sessions wants us to believe he can't remember entire meetings with people he knows, or forgets entire people he should very well remember. If he recalls them conveniently after he's been, well, "busted", I tend to think his selective amnesia is bogus. While I think this is obviously BS and some ass-covering self-lawyering, I think the pattern of what he prefers not to reveal until he bloody well has to says more than what he might independently reveal.
I know this is a little controversial, but Jeff Sessions probably is useless and unable to do the AG thing, recused as he is from Trump-Russia and having in his confirmation hearing recused himself from any of the Clinton investigations Trump (because of course) has pressured the DOJ into. I know this means an AG who might could fire Mueller, but having an AG this compromised (and kind of bigoted and all) is a bummer. I despise Trump for making me want this asshole to stay on. I just can't with these things. I hope federal prosecutors assigned to this conspiracy theory bullshit, like Uranium One (described ably here by the one missionary among the FOX savages, Shep Smith, who has been dodging the cookpot for I know not how long) just throw down a massive press conference and announce "Stop Believing Bullshit!" after the bare minimum debunking any of it should require.
But I have had it with Trump & Co's dumb retaliatory squid-inking nonsense distractions. So let me just lower my dumb ass onto what has to be a journalistic claymore: electronic funds from Russia, marked "To Finance Election Campaign Of 2016” .
No. Seriously. Like, a box of money just sitting out there of rubles that could have been paid for Facebook ads and all that providing a direct link from the Russian government to a disinformation campaign aimed at destabilizing various centers of shit worldwide? Like, what dumbfuck would mark this money for doing the thing it was supposed to be surreptitiously doing out loud where the people would find out? That kind of thing would be so stupid!
But I've been doing this TrumpWorld thing for a while, you see? I don't necessarily think anything is too stupid to be all that credible anymore.